Funny Jokes CollectionThis is a discussion on Funny Jokes Collection within the LaUghTeR AccEleRatED , Just CHILL !! forums, part of the The Lounge !! category; After robbing the bank, 1 robber to clerk : Did you see me robbing?
Clerk : Yes I saw u.
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Status: Offline Posts: 58 Management Paradise Rupees.: 1,464 Join Date: Jan 2009 | Re: Funny Jokes Collection -
March 20th, 2009
After robbing the bank, 1 robber to clerk : Did you see me robbing?
Clerk : Yes I saw u.
Robber killed him and asked to the next clerk : Did u?
Second Clerk : No, but my wife saw u!
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After a big accident, a man was crying : O God! I have lost my lef hand?
Santa : Control yourself my friend. Don’t cry. See that man. He has lost
his head. Is he crying?
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Status: Offline Posts: 58 Management Paradise Rupees.: 1,464 Join Date: Jan 2009 | Re: Funny Jokes Collection -
March 20th, 2009
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Ravi : Papa, jyada kaabil kaun hai? Mein ya aap?
Dad : mein, kyunki mein ek to tumhara baap hu, dursri umar me tumse bada hu,aur
mujhe tumse jyada tajurba bhi hai.
Ravi : Phir to aap jante honge ki light ki velocity ko kisne measure kiya hoga?
Dad : Haan, Einstein ne.
Ravi : Einstein ke papa ne kyu nahi? Unka tajurba to Einstein se kahi jyada hoga na?
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Status: Offline Posts: 58 Management Paradise Rupees.: 1,464 Join Date: Jan 2009 | Re: Funny Jokes Collection -
March 20th, 2009
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Santa : Banta itni sharab na piya karo, tumhari saanso tak se badbu aati hai.
Yehi haal raha to tumhe nark bhi jagah nahi milegi.
Banta : Don’t worry Santa. Saanse to me yehi chorrkar jaunga!!!
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Santa : Ess car ka kya naam hai?
Banta : Pata nahi, lekin S se start hoti hai.
Santa : Kamaal ki car hai, apni car to petrol se start hoti hai | | | | | | | | Trainee Manager Institute: IBS
Status: Offline Posts: 58 Management Paradise Rupees.: 1,464 Join Date: Jan 2009 | Re: Funny Jokes Collection -
March 20th, 2009
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Santa : Yaar meine aaj paper khali chor diya. Mujhe paper me kuch nahi aata tha.
Banta : Meine bhi.
Santa : Aare maar gaye yaar. Hum dono ne paper khali chor diya. Aab teacher samjhenge humne
cheating ki hai. Hum sab fail ho jayenge.
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Naukrani paas khade kutte ke paas gayi aur uske paas 10 rs ka note rakh diya.
“Ye kya kar rahi ho?”, Malkin ne pucha.
Naukrani replied : Yehi to ek hai jisne ess ghar me mera saath diya.
Ye na hota to mein ghar me itne bartan kabhi bhi akele saaf na kar pati.
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Status: Offline Posts: 58 Management Paradise Rupees.: 1,464 Join Date: Jan 2009 | Re: Funny Jokes Collection -
March 20th, 2009
Girl-to-Boy - Aaye bewafe tune sab kuch saaf kar diya,
mera dil jala kar rakh kar diya
Boy-to-Girl - Aye ladki, teri kurbani bekar nahi jayegi,
bhej de rakh mujhe, bartan manjne ke kaam aayegi.
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Pati aur patni ghumne gaye. Raaste me ek gadhe ko ghaas kata
dekh patni ne pati se kaha - Oo G tumhara rishtedaar ghaas
kha raha hai, namaste karo.
Pati - Namaste Sasur Ji
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Santa ne Banta se kaha,”Sabse bada challenge kya hai?”
Banta replied - Answer sheet ko khaali chod do aur last me likh dena,
paas karke dikha.
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Status: Offline Posts: 58 Management Paradise Rupees.: 1,464 Join Date: Jan 2009 | Re: Funny Jokes Collection -
March 20th, 2009
No Algebra for Romans
Romans were never good on Algebra because there ‘X’ was always ‘10.’
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No Two-Piece Please
A lady tourist went to a country on a vacation. In the evening she was toddling on the beach. A security person came to her and said, “Mam only one-piece is allowed here.” The lady was awe, thinking which one to open.
Sardar Giving Introduction
Once a Sardar, his wife, son and daughter went to a private party. There he introduces his family to a stranger by saying, “I am Sardar, she is Sardarni, he is my kid and she is my kidney.”
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Status: Offline Posts: 58 Management Paradise Rupees.: 1,464 Join Date: Jan 2009 | Re: Funny Jokes Collection -
March 20th, 2009
itanic was sinking.
An englishman asked Santa, “How far is land”?
Santa: 2 KMs.
Englishman jumped into sea.
Englishman: Now, which direction?
Santa: Downwards!
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Two days of powercut in Delhi had made life miserable. Worst affected was Delhi Metro station where families of Santa & Banta were struck for 48 hrs on escalators.
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How did santa tried to kill a bird??
He took it to the top of a building and dropped it from there to die.
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Status: Offline Posts: 58 Management Paradise Rupees.: 1,464 Join Date: Jan 2009 | Re: Funny Jokes Collection -
March 20th, 2009
Santa: I have swallowed a kay.
Doctor: When?
Santa: 3 months back!
Doctor: What were you doing till now?
Santa: I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too.
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Santa was drawing money from ATM. Banta, who was just behind him in the line said: I’ve seen ur password. It’s ****. Santa: U r wrong. It’s 1394. | | | | | | | | Trainee Manager Institute: IBS
Status: Offline Posts: 58 Management Paradise Rupees.: 1,464 Join Date: Jan 2009 | Re: Funny Jokes Collection -
March 20th, 2009
Santa falls in love with a nurse… After much thinking, he finally writes a love letter to her: “I luv u sister.”
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Santa asked Banta: Why Manmohan Singh goes for a walk in evening?
Banta: Very simple, because he is PM not AM.
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Teacher: What should be in a book to make it a bestseller?
Pappu: A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl. | | | | | | | | Trainee Manager Institute: IBS
Status: Offline Posts: 58 Management Paradise Rupees.: 1,464 Join Date: Jan 2009 | Re: Funny Jokes Collection -
March 20th, 2009
A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell.
Santa doesn’t turns up for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I’m coming daily since 4 days, I press the bell but no one comes out.
Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy potatos 5 days ago, he hasn’t came back yet!
Santa: Why don’t u cook something else? .
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An Englishman and santa inside the toilet.
Englishman: Good evening, how do u do?
Santa: Good evening, we open the zip and do! | | | |
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