santa banta jokesThis is a discussion on santa banta jokes within the LaUghTeR AccEleRatED , Just CHILL !! forums, part of the The Lounge !! category; Santa asks: Who r u?
Wife: How dare u forget ur wife?
Santa: Nasha har gam ko bhula deta hai
...  | | | | | Trainee Manager Institute: icai
Status: Offline Posts: 1 Management Paradise Rupees.: 448 Join Date: Aug 2008 |  santa banta jokes -
August 20th, 2008
Santa asks: Who r u?
Wife: How dare u forget ur wife?
Santa: Nasha har gam ko bhula deta hai
Santa was busy in removing a wheel from auto, Banta asks: Y r u removing a
wheel from ur auto?
Santa: Can't u read 'Parking for two wheelers only'
Santa: Doctor, ye phulon ki mala kis ke liye?
Doctor: Ye mera pehla operation hai, success hua to mere liye, nahi to
tumhare liye.
Santa: Doc saab, mein Chashma laga ke pad to sakoonga?
Doc: Haan, bilkul.
Santa: To phir theek hai doc saab varna Anpad aadmi ki zindagi bhi koi
zindagi hai.
Santa joined N.A.S.A. After one month the Americans had to change the name from NASA to SATYANASA
Santa apni girl friend ko I Luv U kehta hai aur gir jata hai.
Gal: Yeh kya kar rahe ho?
Santa: I'm falling in love.
Banta: Yeh chaaku kyon ubaal rahe ho?
Santa: Suicide karne ke liye
Banta: To phir ubalne kui kya zaroorat hai?
Santa: Kahin infection na ho jaaye
Santa: Today is Sunday & I wanna njoy, so I bought 3 movie tickets
Jeeto: Why 3?
Santa: For you and your parents
Museum Administrator: That's a 500-year-old statue u've broken.
Banta: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.
Lady Doc: Tum roz subah clinic ke bahar khade ho kar auraton ko kyon
ghoorte ho?
Santa: Ji aap hi ne bahar likha hai: Auraton ko dekhne ka samay 9am-11am
A man to Santa: Aao ji chess khelein
Santa: Tu chal mein sports shoes pehen kar aaya.
At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand,
oh!
Santa: Control yourself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is
he crying?
In an interview,
Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Santa: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr.....
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
Santa: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup...
Santa was getting bitten by mosquitoes the whole night. He got
irritated...drank poison & said, Ab kaato saalon, sab maroge!
Captain of Military: Naujawanon aage bado
Santa aage nahin bada
Captain: Tum aage kyun nahin bade?
Santa: Apne kaha 9 jawanon aage bado, mein 10ve number pe tha
Banta: Yaar teri wife ki maut ka bara afsos hua, vaise hua kya tha?
Sant: Goli lagi thi mathe main.
Banta: Waheguru ji ka shukar kar ke aankh bach gayi.
Santa: tainu Sunny Deol da phone no pata hai...?
Banta: Nahin, kyon ki hoya?
Santa: Yaaar asi Nal patauna si.
Banta: U cheated me.
Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.
Banta: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says This is all India
Radio!
Sadhu: Bachcha teri biwi ko churail chipak gayee hai. Upaaye karvaao.
Banta: Upayaye? Baba, agar do behenein gale mil rahi hain to is mein harz
hi kya hai ?
Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?
Santa: Tipu's skeleton.
Tourist: Whose that smaller skeleton next to it?
Santa: That was Tipu's skeleton when he was child
Napoleon: There is no such word as 'Impossible' in my dictionary.
Santa: To dictionary dekh kar kharidni thi ...!
Santa: Agar tumhe kuch ho gaya to mein Pagal ho jaaunga.
Jeeto: Doosri shaadi to nahin karogey?
Santa: Pagal ka kya hai, kuch bhi kar sakta hai.
Banta: Yeh AUTOMATICALLY kya hota hai?
Santa: Oye tujhe yeh bhi nahin pata, Jab auto mein koi ganji ladki ja rahi
ho to use kehte hain AUTO-ME-TAKLI
Santa was riding on a horse. He jumped the red light & a cop whistles.
Santa lifts the tail of horse & says: 'Le Karle Number Note'
Banta: Oye, tu to Doctor ke paas jaane waala tha, kya hua?
Santa: Yaar kal jaaonga, aaj thodi tabiyat kharab hai.
Santa: Itne kam marks? Do thappad marne chahiye.
Pappu: Haan papa, chalo maine us saale master ka ghar bhi dekh rakha hai.
Santa dials a number. A girl receives the call.
Santa: Who r u? Girl: Seeta here.
Santa: Maine to Chandigarh phone kiya tha, yeh to Ayodhya mil gaya
Santa went to battery shop n asked to change battery.
The shopkeeper asked: Exide laga du?
Santa: Dusri side tera baap lagayega kya?
Q: Why did Santa take his pregnant wife Jeeto to Pizza Hut?
A: Because they advertised: 'Free Delivery'
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Status: Offline Posts: 2 Management Paradise Rupees.: 341 Join Date: Aug 2009 | Re: santa banta jokes -
August 7th, 2009
Santa was busy in removing a wheel from auto, Banta asks: Y r u removing a
wheel from ur auto?
Santa: Can't u read 'Parking for two wheelers only'
Santa: Doctor, ye phulon ki mala kis ke liye?
Doctor: Ye mera pehla operation hai, success hua to mere liye, nahi to
tumhare liye. | | | | | | | | Trainee Manager Institute: Mumbai Business School
Status: Offline Posts: 2 Management Paradise Rupees.: 341 Join Date: Aug 2009 | Re: santa banta jokes -
August 7th, 2009
Santa went to battery shop n asked to change battery.
The shopkeeper asked: Exide laga du?
Santa: Dusri side tera baap lagayega kya?
Q: Why did Santa take his pregnant wife Jeeto to Pizza Hut?
A: Because they advertised: 'Free Delivery' | | | | | | | | Trainee Manager Institute: JNVU, Jodhpur
Status: Offline Posts: 1 Management Paradise Rupees.: 385 Join Date: Aug 2009 | Re: santa banta jokes -
August 8th, 2009
Santa enters a store that sell curtains.
He tells the salesman, "I would like to buy a pair of pink curtains."
The salesman assured him that they had a large selection of pink curtains. He showed him several patterns, but Santa seemed to be having a hard time choosing.
Finally, he selects a lovely pink floral print.
The salesman asked what size curtains he needed.
Santa replies, "Fifteen inches."
"Fifteen inches?" asked the salesman. "That sounds very small, what room are they for?"
Santa tells him that they aren't for a room, they are for his computer monitor.
The surprised salesman replies, "But, sir, computers do not have curtains!"
Santa says, "Hellllooooooooo........I've got Windows!" | | | |
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