Best of Bollywood Dialogues

[Akash_arny]

* The classic:

"main tumhaare bachche ki maan banne waali hoon."

* The eternal reason for being the victim of anything that can
happen to you in
hindi films :" Mai gareeb hoon na , isliye ...."


* A main character in the movie will go to the temple and say :
"Bhagwan mainey tumse aaj tak kuch nahin maanga....."


* Old hindi movie :
"Aiye ji sunte ho.. Aap bade woh hein."


* Lover-girl to leaving lover-boy :
"Mai tumhare bina nahin jee sakti "


* "Kanoon ke haath bahut lambe hote hein"
&
* "Rukjao! kanoon ko apne haath mein mat lo"


* Judge announcing his decision in filmi court :
"Gawaaoon key bayaanat aur saboot ko madde nazar rakhtey
Taz-e-raat-e-hind, dafaa 302 ke tahet , muzrim ko sazaaye maut di jaati hai"


* " Muzrim ko ba-izzat bari kiya jaata hai"


* " Main is Geeta per haath rakhkar yeh saugandh leta hoon ki jo bhi
kahoonga sach kahoonga, aur sach ke siva kuch nahin kahoonga."


* "Inspector! Giraftaar karlo issey"


* " Raam Raam kaaka"


* " Jug Jug jiyo beta "


* " Ab hum kisi ko muh dikhaane ke layak nahin rahe"


* " Kya issi din ke liye tujhe paal pos ke bada kiya tha?"


* Typical farmer ka dialogue :
" mainey is zameen ko apne khoon sey seencha hai "


* Hero/heroine after opening their eyes in the hospital :
" Main kahan hoon?"



* " Hum jahaan khade hote hein, line wahin sey shuru hoti hai"


* " Mai kahti hoon, Door ho jaa meri nazron sey"


* "Is ghar ke darwaaze, tumhare liye hamesha ke liye band hein"


* A Prem-Chopra-type villian to the heroine/village belle :
" In gori gori kalaiyon ko kaam karne ki kya zaroorat hai"


* " Chhod do mujhe, bhagwaan ke liye chhod do"


* " Maine tumhe kya samjha, Aur tum kya nikley!"


* doctor :
" Ab Sab oopar waale key haath mein hai"


* The doctor to the paitent's near n' dear one :
" I'm sorry, hum kuch nahin kar sakey"


* doctor : " Chowbees ghante tak hosh nahin aiya to ..... "


* " Agar Maa ka doodh piya hai to saamne aa."


* " Jyaada hoshiayari karne ki koshish maat karna "


* Amitabh in a hajaar movies :
" Nahin chhodunga tujhe. Jaan sey maar daaloonga."


* " Bhagwaan pe bharosa rakho. Sab thik ho jaiye ga"


* " Woh ek gandi naali ka keeda hai"


* A heroine's expression of what love does to her :
" Mera dil dhak-dhak karta hai "


* " Ajji sunte ho , munna ke pitajee "


* Rich father to son : " Ek phooti kaudi nahin doonga "


* " Zamaane ne thokar laga-laga ke is dil ko paththar bana diya"


* Dharmendra in a hajaar movies : " Kutte! Kamine ! ....."
" Yeh Taklooooo!"


* Lalita Pawar in a hajaar scenes : " Chudeil! Kide pade tere ....."


* Best way to threaten someone from doing anything against your
wishes :
" Agar tumhe maine yeh karne diya, to mera naam ______ nahin"
" Tumne yeh kiya, to mujhse bura koi nahin hoga "


* " Woh kutte ki maut marega "


* " Bol! Bol heere kahan chuppa rakhe hai "


* The favoirite emotional blackmail :
" Tune yeh kiya to tu mere mara muh dekhegi "


* Inspector Iftekar on a megaphone :
" Apne aap ko police ke hawaale kar do. Police ne chaaron taraf
sey tumhe gher liya hai "
" Apne hathiyaar phenk do "


* The classic : " Thairo! Yeh shaadi nahin ho sakti !"


* One of the very best : " Mai tere bachche ki maa banne waali hoon
"


* "Jurm ki duniya ka betaaj badshah ... Kaaliya/Don/whatever "


* Tikku Talsaniya in a hajaar movies " Ouff! Yeh kya ho raha hai "


* Keshto in a million movies " Hi-HEEYAAHH!"


* Shatru a hajaar times " Abbe ChaparGanju! "



* The villian's sidekick : "Boss! Maal pakda gaya "


* "Jo sheeshe ke gharon mein rehne hein, woh doosron pe paththar
nahin
phenkte"


* "Hum woh hein jo paththar ko kaanch se tod liya karte hein"


* All filmi chowkidaars : " Shhalaam Shhaab!"


*- The stereotypical announcer : " Bhaiyon aur behnon ...." "
Ladies and
Gentelmen ..."
- Mehmood, the announcer : " Ladies and Ledas ...."



* " Har kutte ka din aata hai "


* " Mai tumahara aihsaan zindagi bhar nahin bhoolonga"


* " Itnay paise tum kahan sey laiye ?"


* " Bacchhhhaaaooooooooooo......."


* " Police mere peeche lagi hui hai .."


* " Tum mere liye mar chuke ho "


* " Ghar mein do-do jawaan betiyaan hein"


* " Lo! - Muh meertha karo "


* " Hato naa! Log kya kahenge "


* " Khabardaar jo mujhe haath bhi lagayaa .."


* " Aarre! isse to tez bukhaar hai "


* " Maa tum kitni achi ho"


* " Bhaiyaaa!"


* " Yeh aap kya keh rahen hein, bhai sahab?"


* " Aaj Pinky ka janam din hai"


* " Gurkha, isse dhakke maarke bahar nikaal do "


* " Mai yeh tumhaara aihsaan zindagi bhart nahin bhoolonga"


* "Yeh anyay hai Bhagwan"


* "Driver, gaadi roko"


* " pulice ko tum jaise naujawaanon per naaz hai"


* "Ab tumhari maa hanmare kabze mein hai "
" Agar tum paanch llaakh leker, silver beech ke puraney killey pe
nahin
aiye, to mai usse bum se udaa doongaa"


* " Goli se udaa do usse"


* Nirupa roy's favourite " Ek baar mujhe maa kehkar pukaro beta"


* Gracious father taking the blame for his son :
" Yeh khoon maine kiya hai, melod!"


* " Bhaagne ki koshish mat karna"


* " ... mujhe tumhaare is behte hue khoon ki kasam ...."


* " Yeh sauda tumhe bahut mehnga padega"


* Dumb looking hero coming to blind mom :
" Maa, mai first class first pass ho gaya hoon"


* "Beti, tu to paraya dhan hai "


* "Pesh hai duniya ke jaane-maane kalakaar, Miss Renu"


* " Zabaan ko lagaam do .."


* The hindi film unnux :
" Aaja re mere raaja "


* On a suhaagraat nite, wife to husband :
" Doodh pee lijiya"


* " Seedhi Anguli se ghee nikalne waala nahin"


* " Hume tedi anguli se ghee nikaalna aata hai"


* " Kutte ki dum tedi-ki-tedi hi rehti hai "


* " Bhabhi, tumhare haath ki chai peene ko man kar raha hai "


* Dharmendra : " Chun Chun ke maaroonga, ek-ek ko chun chun ke
maroonga "


* " Tune mere peeth pe chura bhoka hai "


Specific dialogues :
---------------------

* Hapless victim: " Bhagwaan ke liye mujhe chhod do!"
Shakti Kapoor : " Aaare bhagwaan ke liye chhod doon to mai kya
karoon?
prasaad khaoon?"

* Utpal Dutt to his daughter in GolMaal :
" Tumhari shaadi usse nahin hogi jisse tum pyaar karti ho, balki
usse hogi
jisse mai pyaar karta hoon."



Here are ten more contributed by Deepak Deolalikar:

1. Yahan teri izzat bachane koi nahi ayega

2. Kanoon jazbaat nahi, saboot dekhti hai

3. judge sahab, maine khoon nahi kiya.

4. kash tum mera yakin kar sakti

5. mein kisi ke muh dikhane kabil nahi rahi

6. ham barbad ho gaye

7. ghar mein jawan beti hai ........

8. tumhare khyal kitne neech hain

9. Tum mujhe galat samajh rahi ho....kash mein sachchai bata sakta

[Akash_arny]

SECOND PART

First Top 10 Hindi Dialogues
Category : Top 10 statements in Hindi movies
10. Kuttay, Kameenay mai tumhe jaan se maar doonga
9. Mai tumhara ehasaan zindagi bhar nahin bhuloonga
8. Itnay paisay tum kahan se laaye?
7. Main tumharay bina mar jaa-oongi.
6. Bacchhhaaaaaooooo.....
5. Yeh anyay hai bhagwan
4. Bataoo, heeray kahan hai.
3. Tum may-re liye mar chuke ho.
2. Police meeray peechay lagi hui hai.
And the number one statement is .....
1. Mai tumharay bachhe ki maa ban-nay waali hoon.

Here are the best of the rest...
- Ghar mein do javaan betiyan hain
- lo...muh meetha kar lo
- mein yeh shaadi nahin hone doongi
- aaj pinky ka janam din hai
- yeh aap kya kah rahen hai, bhai sahib
- Bhaiya !!!!!!!!!!
- Ma, tum kitni achchi ho
- Aaj mein bahut khush hoon
(usually to be followed by a tragicturn of events)
- arre isse to tez bukhar hai
- Nikal jaa mere ghar say...
- Hatoe naa, log kiya kahengay
- khabardaar joe mujhay haat bhee lagaya

and the best:
- tumne apni ma ka dudh piya hai to ...
- gurkha, ise dhakke maarke bahar nikal do.
- Maine tumhe paal pos kar bada kiya..
- Ab tumari maa hamare kabze main hai
- Pulis ko tum jaise naujawanon par naaz hai
- Driver, gaadi roko
- Tum jaise gandi naali ke keede....
- Ek baar mujhe maa keh kar pukaro beta"
- aur ye bechari begunnah hai. That's all, your honor
- tazeerat-e-hind , dafa 302 ke tahat,
mulzim ko maut ki sazasunai jaati hai.
- Mulzim ko Baa izzat bari kiya jata hai
- Ab hum kisi ko muh dikhane ke layak nahin rahe
- (hero/heroine opening their eyes on a hospital bed)
Main kahan hun?

- Kya isi din ke liye tujhe paida kiya tha?
- "Maa main first class first pass ho gaya hu"
followed by the jug jug jiyo beta
- "Yeh sauda thumhe bahut mehenga padega" ??
- Bhagwan, maine aaj tak tumse kuch nahin manga,
aaj pahli baarkuch maang........
- KANOON KE HAATH BAHUT LUMBE HOTE HAIN
- Aey jee! Aap bade woh haiN!

[Akash_arny]

PART THREE

-1--
"Khade khade muh kya dekh rahe ho, jaao, ab to sab ka muh meetha
karna hai."
(standing standing why face you looking, go, now we need to sweeten
everyone's face)
-2--
"Parameswar ki kripa hai, masterjee"
(who cares how the heck it happened,
just shut up and take advantage of it.)
-3--
Frail girl in white salwar lying on a charpoy, dying of the hindi
movie script writer's favourite fatal illness... yes, "Munni ko
blood cayncer ho gaya hai"

"He bhagwan, meri jaan le le, aur mere beti ki jaan bacha de"
(hey god, if it's all the same to you, wanna trade my life
for my daughter's?)

By this time, everyone is resigned to the fact that the daughter
will kick the bucket within the next two minutes, just in time
for daaktarjee to come in and check her pulse... as the background
singers start clearing their throats for the obligatory
"aaa...aaa... chorus"
HINDI MOVIE ONELINERS AND PHATTAS
=================================

"SHOLAY" involving GABBAR SINGH (AMZAD KHAN) and his CHAMCHAS.

GABBAR - Kitne aadami the ?
SAMBHA - Do, Sarkar..
GABBAR - Woh do the aur tum char, Phir bhi tum log wapas aa gaye...
Haramzado, Gabbar ka naam mitti main mila diya...
Iskee sazaa milegi, jaroor milegee...

----

GABBAR - Tera kya hoga, re Sambha ?
SAMBHA - Maine to aapka namak khaaya hai, Sarkar..
GABBAR - To aab goli bhi kha le...

----

How about this classics scene:

The Hero has just married a very poor girl ( who later turns out to be
his father's friend's long lost daughter ) and has brought her home to
introduce to his parents.

Hero: Mala (for lack of a better name), Pitaji ke paon chuo.
( Mala, touch father's feet)

Mala is bending down to touch the father's feet. Suddenly, THE FATHER
MOVES BACK TWO STEPS.

Father: Tum is khandan ki bahu kabhi nahi ban sakti.
( You can never become the daughter-in-law of this house).

Father to Hero: Kamine, tune hamari ijjat ko mitti me mila diya.
Nikalja is ghar se. Aaj se tu mera beta nahin aur
me tera baap nahin. Samajh le ki tera baap mar gaya.
( You have mixed my honour in the mud. Get out of the house.
From today, you are not my son and neither am I your father.
Assume that your father is dead.)

----

My, these cliches from Hindi movies sure are fun. Let's have more of these.

And another classic from "Sholay":

Dharmendra is up on top of the water tower threatening to commit suicide
and is very drunk. Down below there are many villagers watching the drama
unfold, and this classic situation involves two of these fine gentlemen -
G1, and G2.

Dh: Gaon vaalon, mein vahi karoonga jo Heer ne Ranjha ke liye kiya tha,
Romeo ne Juliet ke liye kiya tha - sosait, sosait, sossaait (suicide).
G1: Arre bhai, yeh sossaait kya hota hai?
G2: Arre bhai, jub ungrez marte hain, to usey sossaait kehte hain!!!!

Hats off to the genius who wrote the dialogues!

----

I don't remember where this came from, but i really like it. Here is how
it goes:

The villain has the heroine tied to an electric chair with a long electric
wire leading to a switch. The villain throws the switch and the electricity
is now shown flowing towards the heroin. The hero is running towards the
heroine racing with electricity to save her, and yes he is catching up.

The villain at this point shouts to his chamcha: "Charlie voltage baddhao,
electicity jaldee jayegi".

----

The villain has just asked his guys to get hold of Mudassar Nazar, who
has refused to come to the villain's den.

Sidie: Boss, Mudassar Nazar nahin aa raha hai.
Villain: Kya? Tumhare ankhe hai ya button? Phir se dhoondo!

----

Ajit is on the phone to Seth Dharam Prashad, played by that
insufferable dude, AK Hangal (who, just as an aside, needs to
be eliminated along with Nirupa Roy): (translations provided).

Ajit: Seth Dharam Prashad, aapki beti hamare kabze mein hai!
[Seth Dharam Prashad, your daughter is in my nefarious hands!]

Seth: Hullo, hullo, kaun bol raha hai?
[Hullo, hullo, who is this?]

Ajit: Pyaar se log mujhe tayllipphone kehte hain!
[People affectionately call me tayllipphone!]

(Damn, it loses a certain charm in the translation.)

====

Amitabh B has got out of jail and is bent on finding and beating
up Ajit (who goes by the name JJ in this movie). He calls JJ:
(direct translations provided).

Amitabh: JJ, main abhi abhi jail se nikla hoon!
[JJ, I now now jail from exited have!]

Ajit (JJ): Haan, kaho to phir andhar bhijva doon?
[Yes, say if again inside I send shall?]

====

Hope you enjoy this TOOTI PHOOTI Hindi / English!

The movie is Jaane Bhi Do Yaaro:
The funniest line in the film was probably when Naseeruddin Shah
takes over the role of Duryodhana in the MABHARATA play and says

"Meine Draupadi ka cheer-haran ka idea DROP kar diya hai"
(I've dropped the idea of denuding Draupadi )

(Prem!'s officious comment: )
(Personally, I think Om Puri had the best line in that scene. Om Puri )
(has taken over Bhim's role (gada-dhaari Bhim, no less! :-) and is FOR )
(stripping Draupadi, while Duryodhan (Naseeruddin?) is AGAINST it... )
( )
(When Yudhishtir, played by some sidey actor tries to stop Draupadi )
((who is played by Satish Shah's dead body, (don't ask me why!)) from )
(being stripped of "her" clothes, and Om Puri (Bhim) roughs up this )
(Yudhishtir dude saying: )
( "Abey Oy, tu kaun hota hai bolne waala, )
( ham bhi to Draupadi mein shareholderrr hai!" )
( *end of Prem!'s comment* )

====

How about other gems from the movie:

1. Om Puri trying to help Satish Shah's "old car." In fact it is his
dead body in a coffin, which Om Puri mistook for an old car which
has got its tyre punctured. The best line in the whole episode was
"Ek Sharabi sharabi ke kaam nahin ayega to kaun ayega"
(If one drunkard doesn't help another drunkard, then who else will?)

( Yetanudder comment from Prem! with prem... )
( How could your forget the other line by Om Puri (who is totally drunk))
( "Kaun si modddel hai? Oh ho, Sport car hai, arrey apni )
( to Austin gaddi hai, eh heh, old ij goldd, eh bhai?" )

2. Naseeruddin Shah goes to Satish Shah as a photographer from Times. He
is eating cake. Ravi Baswani signals Naseeruddin Shah to throw some cake
outside so that he can relish it too. Here comes the best one-liner from
NS "Amrika mein kehte hein - thoda khao, thoda pheko."
(NS is telling Satish Shah that it is said in the USA, one should eat
some and throw some)

3. While eulogizing Satish Shah, "Woh gutter ke liye jiye, aur gutter ke
liye mare. Woh kaha karte the ki kisi desh ki unnati uske gutter se jani
jati hai. Unhone apni sari jindgi gutter mein gujar di."
(He lived for gutter, and he died for gutter. He used to say that the
progress of a country can be measured by its gutters. He spent all his
life in gutters.)

4. Then this scene in which Ravi thinks the heroine (sorry, forgot the name)
has come to be photographed, and explained to her that he will take such
a good photo that she will instantly become a top model. The dialogue ends
with a slap from heroine. Then while Ravi is searching for the photographs
she had earlier asked them to develop, Naseeruddin Shah comes in the shop
and he also thinks that she wants to be photographed. the whole scene is
repeated. It was hilarious. Ravi trying to tell NS that she is not what NS
thinks, but everytime NS just shuts him up.

5. The scene in which the two had gone in search of the dead body in the
night. Ravi Baswani is terribly afraid. He wants to search in the area
where he is sure there is no dead body.

( Prem!'s comments again... )
( One of the other alltime memorable lines in this movie was when Om Puri )
( (Ahuja) finds out that Satish Shah (D'Mello) has double crossed him, )
( he (om puri) storms out of the room with his (om puri's :-) lungi )
( hitched up, screaming in a thick Panjaabi accent: )
( "Oye DeeMello, Tu to gaya" )

I would strongly recommend the movie to everyone. Among other comedies,
Angoor (Sanjiv Kumar, based on Comedy of Errors) and Shaukeen (Ashok Kumar,
Hangal and Utpall Dutt) are recommended. Any other comedies that netters
would recommend??

----
Raaj Kumar: Jaani, hum tumhe aisa nahi karne denge...
----
Amitabh Bachchan: Nazar utha ke dekh Gabbar. Tere sar pe maut mandalaa
rahee hai!
----


Ravi : Jitendra
Maa : Nirupa Roy
Foto : Om prakash

Ravi: Maa, Tumhaare aasheervaad se main aaj B.A. FIRST class mein
pass ho gaya hoon.
[ Mom, your cool_dude son graduated today ]
[ Guess what ?! In first class ]

Maa : Bahuth khushee ki baath hai beta. Le, yeh parshaad kha le.
[ Son, that's really impressive. Thulp this parshaad ]

[Roy goes to the Foto of Om prakash, that is hanging on the wall]

Dekho ji. Aaj apke beta ne aap ki baath nibhaya hai.
[ Look hubby, your son the cool dude, what a shot !]

[ Roy to her son ]
Beta ... Ek achchi si naukari doond le Aur,
Jaldi se ek Bahuraani bhi le aaa
[ Son, how about cashing a job and closing on a female ? ]

Ravi: Maa ... uummnn ... Bahu rani tho my dhoond hee liya hai.
[ Geez, closed on a girl already ]

Maa : SSsaachchc?^#!@*&! Kaun hai beta vo khush kismat valee ?
[ Really !, who's that babe ? ]

Ravi: Seth Gangaram ki beti, Asha.

[ ddaannn ...dddaaann .... music in the background
and a face full of *%$*( of Nirupa Roy in the foreground ]
The rest of it is left to your imagination.

The saga continues...

Maa: BETAA!!! Yeh mujhse tu kis janam ka badla le raha hai!?
(Sonny, whatcha screwing up my happiness for?)

Ravi: MAA, tu kyaa keh rahee hai?
(Duh?!?!)

Maa: Beta, yeh wohi Seth Gangaram hai jisne tere pitaajee kaa
khoon karvayaa thaa! (BACKGROUND musicians go CRAZY!)
(You little twerp, this was the same jerk who knocked up
(errr...off) your daddy-jee)

Ravi: Kya!?

Member of Audience: Abbe saale, sunaaee nahi deta tereko!?
(Oh, brother-in-law, can't you hear?)

Ravi: Maa, yeh tu kyaa keh rahi hai?

(Writer's Interjection: Our Hero is not exactly PhD material.)

Maa: Beta, bees saal pehle ke baat hai...
(Son, this happened 20 years ago...)

Ravi: Yeh, yeh mom get on with it. I've heard that before...
(Haan, haan maa aur kuch bolo. Yeh maine sab suna hua hai...)

Maa: (STARTS SOBBING HYSTERICALLY) Beta, beta yeh tu kya keh raha hai...

Audience Member 2: Arre yaar yeh to phir rone lagee!!!
(Geez man this woman started all over again)

Other Members: MAARO MAARO ISSE!!!
(Kill her, Kill her)

SO we Finally get rid of Ms. Roy. Thanks once again to the mob
mentality. Who said mob mentality was all bad!!

----
THE SCENE...
Hema malini(Basanthi) on tonga is being chased by four dakaits
on ghodes...

Basanthi - Chal Dhano! Aaj theri basanthi ki izzhat ka saval hei
Dhano - Arain Basanthi agar tere peeche char daku hein to mere
peeche bhi char ghode hain.Meri izzhat ka bhi saval hei.
----

From Sholay, Amitabh Bachchan to Hema Malini: "Tera naam kya hai, Basanti?"

this should be followed by "Mera naam Basanti hai !!"

then amitabh says in his typical style: "Pehli baar suna"
----

How adout the following from the evergreen Prem Chopra
(repeated umpteen times in the movie.)
"Mein woh bala hu jo sishe se pathar todta hoon."

(Prem!'s comment: )
( )
( and the other one which I am already quite tired of hearing, )
( )
( "Prem... Prem naam hai mera, Prem Chopra" )
( )

-----------
How about this one from Zanjeer?
The hero has just landed in Ajit's (big) 'bungla' to remind him of
what happened 20 years ago. And Ajit goes,
"Aao Vijay, Baito aur hamaare saath ek iscotch piyo. Hum
tumhe kha todi jaayenge. Vaise bhi hum vegetarian hain!!"
------------
The dialogues are from Amitabh movies.

AB: Muche ho to nathulal jaisi ho varna na ho.
(muche = moustache - Prem!'s translation service)

AB: Meri zindagi ka tambu teen bambu pe khada hai sharab, shayari aur aap.

AB: Aadmi zindagi mein sirf do hi baar bhagta hai, ya to olympic ka race
ho ya police ka case ho.
----

I remember one dialogue from Kalicharan, here goes...

Shatrughan Sinha :- [ reacting to unusual nicety by Premnath ]
"D.S.P. Saab aaj kya naag panchami hai?"
Premnath :- [ Surprised ] Nahi to?
Shatrughan Sinha :- To phir aap is naag ko doodh kyo pila rahe hai?
----

(Asjeet seems to have gone back to Sholay here... Prem!)

Dh: When I die, Police coming. Police coming, Buddiya going jail.
In jail, Buddiya Chakki Peesing and Peesing and Peesing....
G1: Are bhabhi, jara haan kar do nan, Yeh to marne ja raha hai.
Basanti's
mother: Are kaise haan kar doon, Dinanath ji!!.
G1: To phir usay marne dogi kya?
B's m: Accha theek hai, Veeru, Main thaiyar hoon.
Main thaiyar hoon!!.
Dh: Are thumse kown shadhi karega buddiya,
main tho Basanti se shadhi karna chahtha hoon.
Basanti: Veeru, main bhi thaiyar hoon.
Dh: Chalo, Basanti thaiyar hai. Buudiya bhi thaiyar hai,
Main neechay uthartha hoon.
----

This dialogue is from the movie Namak Halaal. I hope I do justice to it.
The scene is the one in which Amitabh is introduced to Ranjeet by Ram Sethi
for the first time in the movie.
Ranjeet: Yeh sab to theek hai, magar angrezi vangrezi aati hai ya nahi.
Amitabh: E lo kar lo baat. Are aisi angrezi ave hain ke I can leave angrez
behind. I can talk english, I can walk english, I can laugh english,
because english is a funny language. Bhairon becomes barren and
barren becomes Bhairon because their minds are very narrow. In the
year 1929 when India was playing Australia at the melbourne stadium
Vijay Hazare and Vijay Merchant were at the crease. Vijay Merchant
told Vijay Hazare. look Vijay Hazare, this is a very prestigious
match and we must consider it very prestigiously. We must take this
into consideration, the consideration that this is an important match
and ultimately this consideration must end in a run.
Ranjeet: O.K., O.K.
Amitabh: In the year 1979 when Pakistan was playing against India at the
Wankhade stadium Wasim Raja and Wasim Bari were at the crease and
they took the same consideration. Wasim Raja told Wasim Bari, look
Wasim Bari, we must consider this consideration and considering that
this is an important match we must put this consideration into action
and ultimately score a run. And both of them considered the
consideration and ran and both of them got out.
Ranjeet: O shut up.
----

Villian's Hechman: Boss, Rita (the heroine) bhaag gayee...
(Boss, Rita's escaped.)
Villian: Jaao uska peecha karo! (Go! Follow her!)

Gabbar Singh's Twist: Jaao unkaa peechaa karo, aur khaalee haath mut
anaa haramzaadon!!
(Follow them, and don't come back empty-handed, you bastards.)

----------
Heroine to Villian: Kutte, kameene; chhod de mujhe!!
(Dog; Meanie; leave me!)
Villian: *Grunt*
(Enter) Hero: Haraamzaade, main tera khoon pee jaaungaa!!
(Bastard, I'll drink your blood!)
-----------------
Hero to Mom (first meeting with heroine): Dekho ma main kisse laya hoon!
(Look who I've got to meet you mom!)
Hero's mom: Aao betee, mere paas baitho...
(Come daughter, sit beside me...)

(If that happens to be Lalita Pawaar then we're treated to her awesome
natural wink, if you get what I mean @

Heroine: **BLUSH** **BLUSH** *Quickly pulls ghungat (veil) over her head
and touches her feet (the ma-in-law's feet that is!)*
-----------------

Old man: Bees saal pehle ki baat hai... (This happened twenty years ago...)
*Fade to flashback...*

-----------------
On similar lines:

Low life goondaa "eve-teasing" the heroine is accosted by a mean-
looking crowd.

Man 1: Tumhaare ghar mein kyaa maa, behen nahi hai?
(Don't you have a mom or sister at home?)
Ranjeet's rejoinder: Maa, behen to hai; lekin biwi nahi hai!
(Yeh, yeh. I have a mom and sister, but no wife!)
Audience Member: Abbe maaro saale ko!!
(O you, beat-up the brother-in-law!!)
-------

( )
(We now interrupt this program for some commercial messages --- Prem! :-)
((These are also from Asjeet's collection. Not my creations.) )

Some Indian Commercials:

Nirma Washing Powder
--------------------
Woman: Nirma! Washing powder Nirma. Dood see safedee Nirma se Aaye.
Rangeen kapdon mein khil khil jaaye. Sub ki pasand Nirma!
Washing powder Nirma, washing powder Nirma. NIRMA!!

(Aurat: Nirma! Dhone ka saabun Nirma. White as milk from Nirma.
Colorful clothes blossom blossom. Everyone's choice Nirma!
Dhone ka saabun Nirma, blah blah Nirma. NIRMA!)


Vicco Vujradunti Ayurvadic Cream
--------------------------------
Woman: Badde naazon se paalee hamaaree banno. Tujhe dulhan banaye
(sings) re pyaaree banno. Tujhe haldi ka something-or-the-other lagaayen
sakheeaan. Teri kaya ko komal banaye sakheeaan. Teri sakheeaan
are getting carried away singing and dancing...

(Aurat: My daughter, I have raised you with immense care and at great
personal sacrifices to me. I have kept you away from all those
sleaze-bag boyfriends of yours. So let your pals take this
opportunity to put a lot of gooey stuff on your arms, legs and
face (since we can't show anything else on Doordarshan (TV)).)


O. K. Saabun (Soap)
-------------------
Scene 1: Two men cycling together and discussing world affairs....
Man 1 : Arre yeh toe bahut bada hai! Zaroor mehnga hoga!
(Hey, this toe is really big @ (Should be kinda expensive)
Man 2: Nahi yaar! Bilkul mehenga nahi hai. Naha ke toe dekh!!
(No friend. No way!! It aint expensive. Bathe your toe and see @
Scene 2: Man 2 in the shower with a gulaabee (pink) OK soap in his hand...

Background Music and Voice:
Joe OK say nahae kamal sa khil jaaye. OK nahaane ka badaa saabun.
(If Joe bathes with OK soap, he'll blossom like no ones business.
OK is the BIG bathing soap.)

Voiceover: Company's-name-deleted Utpaadan (Product).

--------------------------

( BACK to the dialogues... )

Heroine: Mein tumhaare bachche ki maa banane waalee hun!
(I'm going to become your kid's mother)
Hero: Kya!? (With a I'm-in-deep-shit-now look) (What?!)

Hero's Mother/Father:
Yeh lo pachchaas hazaar rupaih aur mere bete ko bhool jao.
(Here, take these fifty thousand ruppees and leave our son alone.)

Heroine's Father/Mother:
Kullachchini, maine tujhe issi liye paal-pos ke badaa kiya thaa ke
tu mujhe yeh din dekhaaye?!
(Woman-from-a-lousy-family-tree, did I raise you to show me this day?)

Mom: Kalmoohi! Maine tujhe issi din dekhne ne liye paidaa kiya thaa!
Ke tu mere peeth peechey gulcharrey udhatee phirre!?

(Black face! Did I give birth to you to show me this day!
That behind my back you fly flower-shots around!?)

Girl: Ma! Main Martandya se pyaar kartee hun!
(Mother! I love Martandya)

Boy: Hum ek doosrey ko jee-jaan se chahatey hain...!
(We love one another with our heart-life)

Dad: Haraamzaadey! Teri itni himmat! Meri beti par dorey daalta
hai! Teri haesiyat he kya hai?
(Bastard! Your that many guts! You're putting ropes around
my daughter! What is your social standing after all?)

Raaj Kumar: Arre jaani, jaane bhi do. Do pyaar bharey dil hain. Gulcharrey
nahi udhaengey to kya world affairs discuss karengey kya?
(Oh lively one, let it be. Two love filled hearts these are.
If they don't fly flower-shots what do you expect them to
do -- discuss world affairs?)

==================================

Utpal's dialogues too are equally lively!.
>Dwaraka
>dwaraka@nova.eng.wayne.edu

"National dress ka mazak nahin uda-oge to broad
minded kaise kehloage?" ....in Gol Maal


in which Utpal Dutt wants his daughter
> in law to be a villager and Deepti Naval (who's a doctor) cons him into
> believing that she's an authentic gawar village belle? It was hilarious.
> Arun
>
Most probably the name of the movie is' Kisise Na Kahena'If it is, then in the
same movie Utpal Dutt went to see bride for his son(Farouq Sheikh), the
conversation is as follows;

The girl asked "rock ka bare me aap ka keya kheyal hai?"
She meant music. Utpal Dutt replied " rock ka bare me to mere
jaankari jada nehi hai. mera buisness dusra hai"

----
Amitabh in Coolie (?) : .. jis par pad jaye ek bhee hath
uska bache na ek bhi baal.
isliye naam hai mera iqbal.....
----

Kadar Khan : .. sheeshe ko sheesha kat ta hai,
lohe ko loha kat ta hai,
tujhe paagal kutta katega ....
----

[Akash_arny]

PART FOUR

1. Mukaddar Ka Sikandar:
"Agar sukh rahna chahtheho... tho gaam ko apna lo..."

2. Kaalia:
"Agar ekh Maa ka doodh piyeho... tho samne aaja..."

3. "Hum eint ko eint se jawab denge..."

4. "Aagar thum nahin hothe tho
mein kabka mara hotha..."

5. "abh mujhe kuda bhi nahin rokh saktha.."

6. "thum nahin ho tho mera kuch nahin hain"

7. "thum ho tho mujhe sabh kuch milgaya"

8. "mere daulath se nahin...
mujhse pyar karne wala/wali chahiye"

9. "Mere akhon me dekh ke kaho _____
mujhe sach much pyar nahin karthe"

10. Rajesh Khanna:
"Dhoka kagaya na India?"

11. "Mein thumhare akhon me asoon nahin
dekh saktha _____"

12. Road side Romeo:
"Akhele Akhele kahan ja rahi ho?!"
(Take any popular old song)

13. "Tumen maa behen nahin hai kya?"

14. "Bahoth duur se ayeho....
jera aaram karke jana"

15. "Jab thak vo nahi martha..
mein aaram nahin kar saktha"

16. "Saach bathavo Doctor...
mujhe kya huva hai"

17. "Aap operation ke liya tayyar
kijiye Doctor sahaab...
payse ka mein intazam karunga"

18. Hero's wife to Hero:
"Aap do din mein ek lakh
kahan se layenge?"

19. Hero's wife: "mere gahne(?) bechdho".

20. Helpless Hero to wife:
"Gam ke seva mein thumhe kuch bhi nahin
de sakha ____"

21. "Bagwanke gar mein dher hain...
andher nahi..."

22. "Bagwan thumne ye kya kiya"
or
"Hein Raam..thumne ye kya kiya"

23. "Bagwan thume jaan lena hi hein tho
mere jaan lelo.."

24. "Bagwan..agar mera pyar sachcha hai tho
ise bachchavo.."

25. "Hai Bagwan...thum ithne anyay kayse
bardash karsakthe ho"

(Note: most of these Bagwan to character
dialogues are one to one)

[amardeep.rishi]

In sholey

Basanti and Dhanno scene....

"bhaaag dhanno aaj basanti ki izzat ka sawal hai.....mere peeche gunde aur tere peeche ghode pade hain"

[kartik]

aur tere peeche ghode pade hain

[rohit_pn]

WAAH tat dialogues completes one full bollywood movie........HEHE


BISMIL KA SANDESH HAI KI luknow MEIN JANE WALI TRAIN HUM KAKORI KE PASS LOOTENGE OUR UNHIPAISOSE HUM HATHIYAAR KHARDENGE PAR TU TENSION MAT LE PADAI KAR...........LOL