Go Back   ManagementParadise.com | Management & Business Education Learning Platform The Lounge !! > LaUghTeR AccEleRatED , Just CHILL !!

Misc +17 jokes

Discuss Misc +17 jokes within the LaUghTeR AccEleRatED , Just CHILL !! forums, part of the The Lounge !! category; pregnant woman boards a bus. After taking a seat, she notices a man smiling at her. She feels self-conscious and ...

Reply

 

Thread Tools Display Modes
Misc +17 jokes
Old
 (1 (permalink))
Ctrl Buzz
ctrl_buzz is on a distinguished road
 
ctrl_buzz
Student of MBA at IPM
Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Management Paradise Newbie
Status: Offline
Posts: 100
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Talking Misc +17 jokes - February 6th, 2010

pregnant woman boards a bus. After taking a seat, she notices a man smiling at her. She feels self-conscious and changes her seat, but he seems even more amused.

She moves a third time, and he starts to giggle. On her fourth move, he bursts out laughing.

They both get off the bus at the next stop. The pregnant woman is furious and demands an explanation. "What exactly is so damn funny?"

"I'm sorry, ma'am," replies the giggling man. "But I couldn't help noticing you're pregnant, and when you first sat down, you sat under an advertisement which read 'Coming Soon: The Gold Dust Twins.' Then you sat under an ad that read 'Sloan's Liniments Remove Swelling.' Then you moved under a deodorant advertisement which read 'William's Stick Did the Trick.' And I just couldn't hold it in any longer when you moved a fourth time and sat under a tire advertisement which read 'Dunlop Rubber Would Have Prevented This Accident.'"
Advertisements

Friends: (0)
Reply With Quote
Re: Misc +17 jokes
Old
 (2 (permalink))
Ctrl Buzz
ctrl_buzz is on a distinguished road
 
ctrl_buzz
Student of MBA at IPM
Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Management Paradise Newbie
Status: Offline
Posts: 100
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Re: Misc +17 jokes - February 6th, 2010

e calls a pharmacy and asks if she needs an infant scale to weigh a baby. The clerk explains that many women figure out an infant's weight by weighing themselves while holding the baby on an adult scale, then the mother weighs herself alone and subtracts the second amount from the first.

"Oh, that won't work," replies the blonde. "I'm not the mother -- I'm the aunt."
Friends: (0)
Reply With Quote
Re: Misc +17 jokes
Old
 (3 (permalink))
Ctrl Buzz
ctrl_buzz is on a distinguished road
 
ctrl_buzz
Student of MBA at IPM
Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Management Paradise Newbie
Status: Offline
Posts: 100
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Re: Misc +17 jokes - February 6th, 2010

Q: Why do women rub their eyes in the morning?

A: Because they don't have any balls to scratch.
Friends: (0)
Reply With Quote
Re: Misc +17 jokes
Old
 (4 (permalink))
Ctrl Buzz
ctrl_buzz is on a distinguished road
 
ctrl_buzz
Student of MBA at IPM
Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Management Paradise Newbie
Status: Offline
Posts: 100
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Re: Misc +17 jokes - February 6th, 2010

I'm sitting on this plane, eating my dinner, when all of a sudden the captain comes on the loudspeaker and tells us that the plane is about to crash land into the mountains. The next thing I know this woman from the front of the plane jumps up from her seat and starts screaming like a lunatic.
"I can't die today! I WON'T die today! I am twenty-seven years old! I have been on countless dates and no one has ever made me feel like a woman! Please, I don't want to die like this! Is there anyone on this airplane that can make me feel like a woman?"
The entire plane went from hysteria to complete silence. Then, from the back of the plane, someone stood up. He was a dark, tall, well-built, handsome man.
"I can make you feel like a woman," was his reply.
He started walking slowly down the isle to the woman, who was now shaking with anticipation. One by one he started unbuttoning his shirt buttons, revealing his rippling stomach muscles. He quickly took his shirt off, slowly reached for her trembling hand, looked in her eyes and said...
"Iron this!"
Friends: (0)
Reply With Quote
Re: Misc +17 jokes
Old
 (5 (permalink))
Ctrl Buzz
ctrl_buzz is on a distinguished road
 
ctrl_buzz
Student of MBA at IPM
Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Management Paradise Newbie
Status: Offline
Posts: 100
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Re: Misc +17 jokes - February 6th, 2010

Son: ''Dad, where did all of my intelligence come from?''
Dad: ''Well, son, you must have gotten it from your mother, 'cause I still have mine.''
Friends: (0)
Reply With Quote
Re: Misc +17 jokes
Old
 (6 (permalink))
Ctrl Buzz
ctrl_buzz is on a distinguished road
 
ctrl_buzz
Student of MBA at IPM
Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Management Paradise Newbie
Status: Offline
Posts: 100
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Re: Misc +17 jokes - February 6th, 2010

When is a woman above a man?
When the kitchen is upstairs!
Friends: (0)
Reply With Quote
Re: Misc +17 jokes
Old
 (7 (permalink))
Ctrl Buzz
ctrl_buzz is on a distinguished road
 
ctrl_buzz
Student of MBA at IPM
Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Management Paradise Newbie
Status: Offline
Posts: 100
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Re: Misc +17 jokes - February 6th, 2010

A newly married man was discussing his honeymoon. He says to his buddy at lunch, "Last night, I rolled over, tapped my beautiful young wife on the shoulder, gave her a wink, and we had ourselves a performance! Later that night, about 2 o'clock, I rolled over, gave my sweetie a nudge, and we had ourselves another performance. Well, being so newly married and not yet tired of the task, I waited quietly in bed while my beauty slept until I couldn't wait any longer. It was 4 o'clock when I gave her a little nudge. She opened her blue eyes and smiled sweetly. We immediately had ourselves a rehearsal."
"A rehearsal?" his buddy asks, "Don't you mean a performance?"
"No, because a rehearsal is when nobody comes.
Friends: (0)
Reply With Quote
Re: Misc +17 jokes
Old
 (8 (permalink))
Ctrl Buzz
ctrl_buzz is on a distinguished road
 
ctrl_buzz
Student of MBA at IPM
Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Management Paradise Newbie
Status: Offline
Posts: 100
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Re: Misc +17 jokes - February 6th, 2010

Man to wife: ''Boy, you are getting old, look at all the wrinkles you are getting!''
Wife: ''They aren't wrinkles, they're laugh lines!''
Man: ''Nothing is that freakin' funny!!'''
Friends: (0)
Reply With Quote
Re: Misc +17 jokes
Old
 (9 (permalink))
Ctrl Buzz
ctrl_buzz is on a distinguished road
 
ctrl_buzz
Student of MBA at IPM
Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Management Paradise Newbie
Status: Offline
Posts: 100
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Re: Misc +17 jokes - February 6th, 2010

Height of Lazines
A boy lying on a naked girl waiting for an earthquake.
Friends: (0)
Reply With Quote
Re: Misc +17 jokes
Old
Ctrl Buzz
ctrl_buzz is on a distinguished road
 
ctrl_buzz
Student of MBA at IPM
Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Management Paradise Newbie
Status: Offline
Posts: 100
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh
Re: Misc +17 jokes - February 6th, 2010

Q: What's hairy on the outside, wet on inside, starts with a "c" and ends in a "t'?

A: A coconut -- and you should be ashamed of yourself.
Friends: (0)
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
jokes, misc
Related to Misc +17 jokes
 

Similar Threads

Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
misc 4 sagarshines2 Miscellaneous Projects 3 June 16th, 2010 02:59 PM
misc 7 sagarshines2 Miscellaneous Projects 2 February 1st, 2009 11:45 AM
som misc project sunshutch Miscellaneous Projects 2 February 1st, 2009 11:28 AM
Misc Projects napjain Miscellaneous Projects 2 October 22nd, 2007 05:19 PM
misc sagarshines2 Miscellaneous Projects 0 June 16th, 2007 11:07 PM
 


Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off


ManagementParadise.com is not responsible for the views and opinion of the posters. The posters and only posters shall be liable for any copyright infringement.



Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO ©2011, Crawlability, Inc.