Facts of Life

[rajanarora72]

"God is the outcome of Fear"







"Early to bed, early to rise, and your girlfriend goes out with other guys."









"Theists should never complain no matter what happens in the world because nothing happens without the almighty's will. So if I break your head, murder your kin, dont blame me. God made me to do it."









"A cigarette shortens your life by 2 min..

A beer shortens your life by 4 min..

A working day shortens your life by 8 hours!!!!.."



Ø When I was born, I was so surprised I didn't

talk for a year and a half.







Ø Join the army, see the world, meet interesting

people, and kill them.







Ø Until I was 13, I thought my name was 'Shut

Up.'







Ø I'm not afraid to die. I just don't want to be

there when it happens.







Ø Always and never are two words you should

always remember never to use.







Ø I've never been drunk, but often I've been

over served.







Ø The road to success is always under

construction.







Ø I say no to drugs -- they just don't listen!







Ø Marriage is one of the chief causes of

divorce.







Ø Work is fine if it doesn't take up too much of

your time.







Ø When everything's coming your way, you're in

the wrong lane.







Ø Born free; Taxed to death.







Ø Everyone has a photographic memory; some

people just don't have film.







Ø Life is unsure; always eat your dessert first.







Ø Smile -- it makes people wonder what you're up

to.







Ø I love being a writer... what I can't stand is

the paperwork.







Ø A printer consists of 3 main parts: the case,

the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light.







Ø The hardest part of skating is the ice.







Ø The guy who invented the first wheel was an

idiot; the guy who invented the other three, he was

the genius.







Ø The trouble with being punc tual is that

there's no one there to appreciate it.







Ø If our constitution allows us free speech, why

are there phone bills?







Ø If you tell a man there are 300 billion stars

in the universe, he'll believe you. But if you tell

him a park bench has just been painted, he has to

touch it to be sure.







Ø Beat the 5 O'clock rush: leave work at noon!







Ø If you can't convince them, confuse them.







Ø It's not the fall that kills you; it's the

sudden stop at the end.







Ø I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your

horn louder.







Ø Hot glass looks same as cold glass. (Cunino's

Law of Burnt Fingers)





Ø Someday is not a day of the week





When the house is rocking….don’t bother knocking!! Just steppin….



And the last one…..

They say, there is always a woman behind a successful man! So don’t try for success….just find that woman!!!