Would u take or give dowry for your marriage?

[DRISHYA]

hi evrybody,
Dowry is so much a part of Indian sytem. Even though there is rule restricting it ( in paper works) we all know it is practised even now.

But i am proud to say that KANNUR is a one place which i know in kerala when dowry system doesnt exist (probably due to the rule of Marxist party at that time..... dont know the exact info about the initiator, but hats off to u guys). If a boy asks for dowry it would be considered shameful on his part to ask becoz that would mean he's not capable enough! Infact the groom is suppose to buy evrythng for the bride for marriage ceremony...interesting naaa.

So now tell me have any of ur family members taken or given dowry? Or would u give or take dowry?


COME ON.... let us see how we are progressing!!!!

[gaurav200x]

hi evrybody,
Dowry is so much a part of Indian sytem. Even though there is rule restricting it ( in paper works) we all know it is practised even now.

But i am proud to say that KANNUR is a one place which i know in kerala when dowry system doesnt exist (probably due to the rule of Marxist party at that time..... dont know the exact info about the initiator, but hats off to u guys). If a boy asks for dowry it would be considered shameful on his part to ask becoz that would mean he's not capable enough! Infact the groom is suppose to buy evrythng for the bride for marriage ceremony...interesting naaa.

So now tell me have any of ur family members taken or given dowry? Or would u give or take dowry?


COME ON.... let us see how we are progressing!!!!
Very interesting topic...

I totally agree that dowry is a very bad practice and in my opinion, the guy who asks for dowry shamefully , can not be considered capable from any angles... These days guys and girls should become self dependent, so that they can take care of each other and their parents also.

Rightfully what Munshi premchand said "Agar mera bas chale toh mai dhahej lene aur dene walon, dono ko goli maar dun" [If had it been my will, i would have shot both the ones who take and those who give dowry]

[roshcrazy]

no, askin for dowry..is a crime...if d guy or his family happens 2 ask dowry..i guess they jus cravin for money...

so many families mentally torture d gals for money...even after gettin dowry..they want more n more and they harass d gal n keep askin for more....

i strongly believe tht such ppl must be punished.infact these days action is been taken agnst such crimes...i had been to central jail durin my IV...majority of ppl were locked up bcoz of dowry...

dowry must certainly nt be encouraged..

[born2rule]

dowry practise is still prevailing in our country..although there is a law for dowry,,but i think it is not enforced properly..

[mando25]

I completely agree. Till a few months back, I was under the impression that with our generation, the system of dowry is finally meeting it's end. But when some of my friends started to get married, I was shocked with their thinking. They treat dowry as a right and have already planned for the money they are going to recieve.
If this is the condition of the educated youth of today, it is not hard to imagine what would be happening with the less educated.

[shalaka]

not at all buddy
i wud like to stay alone but no dowary

[cpswain]

why not Dowry?whaen I have spent so much on my education n up bringing.then why should not i paid for this.the girl will enjoy the better life with me.when i'm getting so ,much with out any risk,why should not I...

[roshcrazy]

why not Dowry?whaen I have spent so much on my education n up bringing..

well fren,u spent sooooo much on education for urself n ur upbringing nt for d gal u gettin married to......if u regret soo much tht u spent on ur education, i guess u shdnt hv taken up studies...u spent ur money on urself n on ur will..tht was ur choice..wht has d gal u gettin married got 2 do wid it...!?!!!?!!

then why should not i paid for this.the girl will enjoy the better life with me....when i'm getting so ,much with out any risk,why should not I..:SugarwareZ-064: trust me, no gal wud enjoy such so-called better lyf ..:|
i wonder, wht makes u call it BETTER LIFE!?!!

[shrinivaskhanolkar]

kill them who take dowry.............

[deepakraam]

Why not a dowry?Husband is going to take care of the girl,gng to become his wife, for her entire life.So in this world nothing comes for free.So we can have dowry.


-Deepak.

[gaurav200x]

why not Dowry?whaen I have spent so much on my education n up bringing.then why should not i paid for this.the girl will enjoy the better life with me.when i'm getting so ,much with out any risk,why should not I...

Why not a dowry?Husband is going to take care of the girl,gng to become his wife, for her entire life.So in this world nothing comes for free.So we can have dowry.


-Deepak.

So, u u guys and all the guys out there (who are in the favour of dowry)

here are some questions...

1) Why do u want to marry and get a burden.... Don't ask for burden and hence, u won't need to ask for money also...

2) And if u still feel the need... then why study or work....

Cpswain, why do u need to study or work? U could simply get married to a well-qualified, high-earning girl and instead ur parents could give dowry to the girl....

How would u feel then? Ur comments on 'why i should not get paid for it' seem very cheap here.... more so like a hooker saying... i did so-and-so as u asked and now pay me... Pls don't feel upset, but the word "paid" reflects this. If u're taking a risk in ur life, so is the girl... Do u really want to prove that u're a big loser who isn't capable of taking care of her, but needs his papa's money ??

I am sorry to say guys, but this is narrow-minded thinking... Who says girls want to sit at home and earn free bread.... Look around and u will find girls who are equally ambitious as guys and want to do something in their life and support their families.

So is ur asking for dowry justified... ??

Deepak, let me ask u.... why do u think that a husband alone will take care of the girl.... i feel the girl contributes equally as the boy... unless u are thinking that the girl is some house-maid...

Yep! nothing comes free of cost.... U get married to a girl who would be taking care of u the rest of her life, give u ur family heir, take care of ur parents.... Isn't all this the cost she is paying through marriage (according to ur definition)

Then in this so-called transaction, where does money come into play.

If u guys think, that u're doing a favour on someone by marrying them and asking for a payment for them.... Think again.... Girls would prefer to show u the "middle finger" and walk away...

[kumar.neeraj.83]

DOWRY????

never....n probably if i can .....will abolish all the dowry traders in the world

[sheetal k]

Dowry....its so veru superstitious..i wont giv

[DRISHYA]

So, u u guys and all the guys out there (who are in the favour of dowry)

here are some questions...

1) Why do u want to marry and get a burden.... Don't ask for burden and hence, u won't need to ask for money also...

2) And if u still feel the need... then why study or work....

Cpswain, why do u need to study or work? U could simply get married to a well-qualified, high-earning girl and instead ur parents could give dowry to the girl....

How would u feel then? Ur comments on 'why i should not get paid for it' seem very cheap here.... more so like a hooker saying... i did so-and-so as u asked and now pay me... Pls don't feel upset, but the word "paid" reflects this. If u're taking a risk in ur life, so is the girl... Do u really want to prove that u're a big loser who isn't capable of taking care of her, but needs his papa's money ??

I am sorry to say guys, but this is narrow-minded thinking... Who says girls want to sit at home and earn free bread.... Look around and u will find girls who are equally ambitious as guys and want to do something in their life and support their families.

So is ur asking for dowry justified... ??

Deepak, let me ask u.... why do u think that a husband alone will take care of the girl.... i feel the girl contributes equally as the boy... unless u are thinking that the girl is some house-maid...

Yep! nothing comes free of cost.... U get married to a girl who would be taking care of u the rest of her life, give u ur family heir, take care of ur parents.... Isn't all this the cost she is paying through marriage (according to ur definition)

Then in this so-called transaction, where does money come into play.

If u guys think, that u're doing a favour on someone by marrying them and asking for a payment for them.... Think again.... Girls would prefer to show u the "middle finger" and walk away...





I agree wit u gaurav. I am completely shocked to see that even in this site we have educated people thinking that dowry is their right. really shameful n shocking!!!!

[DRISHYA]

why not Dowry?whaen I have spent so much on my education n up bringing.then why should not i paid for this.the girl will enjoy the better life with me.when i'm getting so ,much with out any risk,why should not I...

Why not a dowry?Husband is going to take care of the girl,gng to become his wife, for her entire life.So in this world nothing comes for free.So we can have dowry.


-Deepak.





I am sorry, but its very SHAMEFUL of u people who are educated speaking about dowry as your right. TOday men are not the only breadwinner at home. Even women work. we can even see that at certain place women are running the home n men are just wasting the money on drinks n gambling.
Whats the guarantee that u people would take good care of the women you marry? IF U ARE TAKING MONEY FROM HER FOR "YOUR" LIFE ITS BETTER INSTEAD OF BRINGING TO YOUR HOME U BETTER STAY AT HERS.
R u running an orphanage or institute where u say come marry me n alos submit the money.. i'll take good care of u!!!!!!!!!
If people are spending to educate a boy then they are equally spending on a girl child's education. That is the reason why i am able to give my opinion in this site.
I think we get such of thinking because of our family's thinking. The way in which they have moulded our thinking.
So people, please educate your child morally well or else we are going to have many future geeks who are INCAPABLE of taking care of their girl

[rajee_85]

Dowry taking is a crime and one should be punished for it. But unfortunately most of the people don’t think like that. Even my cousins got married by giving heavy dowry. If one is not willing to give dowry they don’t get married. What happens to our educated men, in fact people who are well educated they demand more dowries? How could dowry be eliminated? How could law be enforced properly when whole society is doing this crime?

[gaurav200x]

How could dowry be eliminated? How could law be enforced properly when whole society is doing this crime?

I think it i very difficult to report and then prove such crimes. I think the responsibility should lie with the guys... They should be bold enough to say .... "Dowry?? No, Thank You!"


Only when they learn to say NO, can they become a real man, and only then can this be eliminated...

[anu shukla]

hii everyone...
so here are my views:

1st of all unlike others i wud really like to thank those guys who dare to say taht they have no problem iin taking dowry!!! atleast they have guts to say taht!!! which is considered as the 1st step in changing the behavior!!!

we all have different opinions ..its only whn we stick to our rationale then we are able to talk...abt those who condemn the "guys" should actually refrain..i wud better be presenting my view rather than insulting( ya i did feel like that after reading the harsh comments) them!!!


first.. what is dowry??
is it anything taht is given by bride's family to groom ..or is it smthing which is forcefully taken frm bride's family?
if the groom demands sm money...so still the situation is much better as bride has always the option to move on...so i dn't feel anything bad in that!!!


if the person is satisfied with watevr he has got then its an ideal case!!
but if the person pretends to be satisfied...here comes the catche!!!then its a problem:he may / may not demand dowry afterwards...then also i feel its more of bride's freedom to actually stay or leave...

but whn she is nt led to leave...then its crime...fr which legal action can be taken...

after all this the problem is taht girls usually dn't complain as they have been tld taht they have to stay with their partner , doesn't matter wat he does!!so in order to be taht guddy guddy papa's girl...she stays back!! they dn't think taht their one such step actiually leads to hell ...their life as well as their chidren!!!

so many a times wat we sarcastically call as women empowerment is really needed there although a strict warning is to APPLY YOUR BRAINS B'FORE REACTING!!! as many a times girls do hullaboo without any reason jus to have media empathy( few recent dowry cases on news channels were found to be foaxed!!)

take care
anu

[akila2187]

the main problem with india is tat many females r unaware about the law and rule tat protects them frm dowry abuse... very few literate women kno about the organisations who work for their rights...... firstly they need to be made known.... and secondly the places where such practises exsits the women are totaly illiterate and unaware of these laws....

for this the groom need to be made to kno tat he too can raise voice againts his family if they demand dowry .... by this this system and be reduced.. and again my spreading the awareness about these rules and the organisations where these women and seek help ... can create a huge difference........

[arora]

no dowry.... if u think dat jus bcoz u will take care of ur wife, u can take dowry, then u 2 should pay her bcoz she too will take ur care along wid ur family... infact u need to pay more....

[sheetal k]

for this particular question ther is no thoinking that is to be done, it needs to b spontanious a clear cut straight no! its then i would say v hv progressed!it needs to be implicit!

[amirapu_sow]

Definetly not......why is such unlawful practice being followed still shows the attitude of people....i strongly hope people start recognising dowry taking and giving as a serious offence and look down on them....coz only social movement can bring change in the anti-dowry system.
Hope to see such equal status giving India.

[DRISHYA]

hii everyone...
so here are my views:

1st of all unlike others i wud really like to thank those guys who dare to say taht they have no problem iin taking dowry!!! atleast they have guts to say taht!!! which is considered as the 1st step in changing the behavior!!!

we all have different opinions ..its only whn we stick to our rationale then we are able to talk...abt those who condemn the "guys" should actually refrain..i wud better be presenting my view rather than insulting( ya i did feel like that after reading the harsh comments) them!!!


first.. what is dowry??
is it anything taht is given by bride's family to groom ..or is it smthing which is forcefully taken frm bride's family?
if the groom demands sm money...so still the situation is much better as bride has always the option to move on...so i dn't feel anything bad in that!!!


if the person is satisfied with watevr he has got then its an ideal case!!
but if the person pretends to be satisfied...here comes the catche!!!then its a problem:he may / may not demand dowry afterwards...then also i feel its more of bride's freedom to actually stay or leave...

but whn she is nt led to leave...then its crime...fr which legal action can be taken...

after all this the problem is taht girls usually dn't complain as they have been tld taht they have to stay with their partner , doesn't matter wat he does!!so in order to be taht guddy guddy papa's girl...she stays back!! they dn't think taht their one such step actiually leads to hell ...their life as well as their chidren!!!

so many a times wat we sarcastically call as women empowerment is really needed there although a strict warning is to APPLY YOUR BRAINS B'FORE REACTING!!! as many a times girls do hullaboo without any reason jus to have media empathy( few recent dowry cases on news channels were found to be foaxed!!)

take care
anu





there is no question about money or dowry in love n marriage. It seems that it is prevailing only in india. Does more dowry ensure u a good married life? or would ur spouse love u more for it? the answer is a definite NO. There are no conditions in a realtionship.
Dowry had spoiled the life of many. we understand that the groom's people ask a hefty amount which will cost u a fortune. 2morrow if u happen to have daughters n as inflation is rising and if they happen to marry a very educated person but demand dowry in crores at that time would u realise what people r going through.And I m not exagrattng abt "crore" today people demand in lakhs... 2morrow it would be crores..
If girls need to give money to others to take care of herself then she better keep thet amount with her and live life her own.

[DRISHYA]

Dowry taking is a crime and one should be punished for it. But unfortunately most of the people don’t think like that. Even my cousins got married by giving heavy dowry. If one is not willing to give dowry they don’t get married. What happens to our educated men, in fact people who are well educated they demand more dowries? How could dowry be eliminated? How could law be enforced properly when whole society is doing this crime?


We can make a change by educating our own family n friends. I think government should give good publicity about this issue n bring it in front of people and proclaim is as a crime n take serious action against it especially amongst "educated illiterate''. Government can make it a part of education from standard 1 as some days back i read in TIMES OF INDIA that, a 5 year old was arrested because he was troubling his in laws for dowry..... see child marriage n also the bad thinkng which the child has imbibed from his parents.
If its a part of education.... then we will have a different INDIA tommorrow.

[born2rule]

by marrying a gal u re not doing any favour on her...

[maddyrules]

Isnt the same for you?

[maddyrules]

Dowry was primarily meant for making the girl live prosperously in her husband's home.
Now it has drastically changed its form where its deteriorating her life.

[pvc]

well, it is very shame for us that dowry cases are still exist in our country.i think this is the matter on which parents should think.instead of spending money on dowry, they should invest them on their daughter's education.in this way they can make her life more convenient.
spending on dowry is wastage where as spending on education is investment & that too risk free...........
howz that

[hunk.vipul]

nonsense!!!
anyone taking and giving dowry should be behind the bars

[Jayita]

No its absolutely a crime n marriage is an institution that should be respectable n pure n no dowry should be taken or give!

[born2rule]

I think the most greedy family will take dowry..Bcos they feel tht gal is burden on them..this is pathetic if husband is taking dowry tht means he cant even take care of his wife..he is so incapable tht he cnt earn his livelihood..shameful..

[spiderman]

YOU SHOULD MARRY THE PERSON NOT THE WEALTH SO DONT TAKE DOWRY OR DONT GIVE IT SIPLE AS THAT

[Chiraggbp]

no dowry @<hidden> all
.
.
.
no give or take of dowry

[gunjan21]

i m totaly against the dowry system, and to eradicate this frm our society wat all v can do is v can take action against ppl who are practising dowry in our locality.

wat do u think guys do correct me if m wrong.

this not m saying only but i have taken action against pll wo wer practising in my loclality only

[DRISHYA]

Ohh..... its good to see that we are having people like u who are actually doing something for this society..... n also doing wat u r preaching!!!!!!
Koodos 4 Gunjan!!!!

[arunkumarmvb1984]

Some people claim that they have not demanded anything as dowry.But actually their demands are very huge that converts even a well-settled person to a pauper.The cause of concern is not the amount paid as dowry but the attitude of the people who consider it as their right.The most important thing is that the demands does not end in marriage.When some of these are not met, the girl has a disappointing life through out her life-span.

[ahmermbalbale]

Well in Islam the groom has to pay to his wife which is called 'Maher.' This maher is given for her future security.It is upto the bride to decide how much amount of maher she wants to receive....n this maher system is still being practised widely...a nice tradition to b practiced in t generation where people are being killed for dowry

[DRISHYA]

it is fine if bride brings whatever she wishes like n groom doesnt have a say in it..
If brides r supposed to bring money for both husband n wife's future then y is husband there for? Girl takes care of children, husband n home n so husband is supposed to earn then y girl bother about giving money at marriage?

[priti..]

u r trying to tell that u will take dowry because u will take care of her
now in this time women r not sitting at home even they work and r able to take care of them properly
now many women r there who take of the entire family financially

i am not in the favour of takeing dowary.

[mayur_balani]

i will not take dowry. even if my to be wife's family is willin to give me dowry then i will tell my family to give the same in return.

[RAHUL2021]

No..i wont....
its like u r charching a price for urself.....
as if u r a commodity....

[tejas15aug]

no dowry at all ...and lets not give it some other form of gift and if it si the case then dont make it compulsion or social ritual for others in the society who cant afford it ...no dowry help the needy and get help when you need them ....

[Bhupesh]

NO i will not give or take dowry